What would you do if your spouse refused to end a friendship with someone of the opposite sex? What if that friend of the opposite sex acted inappropriately toward your spouse? One Reddit user posted about this very issue on the popular AITA subreddit, and readers appear to be in overwhelming support of her.
User FlakyStay6087 asked if she’s wrong for questioning her husband’s friendship with a mutual female friend of theirs, especially after the woman’s apparent disrespectful behavior. According to the post’s author, the woman became a mutual friend of the couple’s through the husband’s D&D group, and that she’d even become one of the bridesmaids in her wedding. However, as time progressed and their friendship deepened, OP noticed that the other woman’s comments and behavior toward her husband became more and more inappropriate.
“She often made comments about how attractive she found him and even said she would sleep with him if given the chance,” the post’s author wrote about her husband’s friend.
OP also wrote that others in their friend group noticed the other woman’s out-of-pocket behavior, including at OP’s wedding to the man she had clearly been eyeing. Friends of OP and her husband also told her that the other woman was spreading rumors about her being “financially abusive” to her husband for not merging her finances with his, and she’d even gone as far as to tell their friends that OP wasn’t “sexually compatible” with the man she’d married.
Her husband won’t end the friendship
According to OP, her husband doesn’t see a problem with the friendship he’s maintaining with this woman. He’s repeatedly dismissed his wife’s concerns, and claims that this is “just how she is.” He has outright refused to even confront the female friend about her inappropriate behavior, claiming he won’t do so until she “makes a blatant move,” on him. In the face of his wife’s discomfort and knowing that this friend of his wants to sleep with him, he has refused to remove a disrespectful element from his life and his marriage. Now OP is worried that she is being unreasonable in wanting a boundary involving the friend between her and her husband.
Reality Check
This is a tale as old as time, and if anybody is in the wrong in this scenario it’s the husband first and foremost for refusing to nip it in the bud. Of course the female friend in this story is also in the wrong, knowing damn well that she is being disrespectful toward her married friends — and especially toward the wife. The wife has done nothing wrong by wanting her husband to set a firm boundary with this other woman or otherwise end the friendship altogether, and she shouldn’t be put in a position where she is second-guessing her own comfort to allow her spouse to continue being as disrespectful as the other woman.
What would you do if you were faced with this scenario? Would you demand that your husband confront the female friend and put a stop to the inappropriate behavior, or would you allow it to continue?
Chelsea Hoffman is a true crime writer with over a decade of professional writing experience. She is best known for her coverage of missing people including the tragic disappearance of Madeleine McCann as well as the heartbreaking cases of Dylan Redwine, Heather Elvis and many others.
